Don’t say everything you think

Sometimes we forget that virtue is in the middle between two extremes , and that sincerity does not consist in telling others everything that goes through our minds , but in expressing without pretending, without implying something that is not true.

Many times the best way to express yourself is to remain silent because, why speak if the word is not going to bring anything good? Why pronounce a hurtful opinion if nobody has asked us for it? Why snatch dreams simply because we have been unable to achieve ours? Why contradict who is in front of us when, if we stop to think about it, we will realize that neither their experience nor their circumstances are ours? When one says everything he thinks, without thinking what he says or without thinking about the consequences of what has been said, he reveals an inordinate pride, an unlimited vanity, the conviction that his word is the Truth and that -as such- it must be law.

I experienced it recently, in a social gathering that I had to attend. I ran into a verbal incontinent. , someone whose tongue was directly connected I don’t know if with the heart or with his lack of it, a person who spat words as if they were sharp darts, an individual who with every expression destroyed a bridge and built a barricade. I don’t know how one can live as if it were an atomic bomb, annihilating everything around him. I saw him speak to three people, and at three he tried to humiliate, at three he belittled, at three he criticized … And at least two of them are extraordinary people personally, intellectually and professionally. The third time I did not know her, but it did not seem to me that she had anything to be ashamed of in front of that monument to stupidity that ended up finding what she deserved.

Because, as Dale Carnegie remembered , if you want to collect honey, don’t kick the hive. Attacking everyone around you is not only a sign of moral misery, but of profound imbecility. Because it shows an inability to judge yourself and to judge others with lucidity, an absolute lack of measurement of strength. No matter how clever and powerful you think you are, you should know that offenses are like homing pigeons, they always come back. And, in his case, they came back … Oh, they did come back … Someone -who knew who he was dealing with-, after trying to build bridges three times, got tired of playing the Good Samaritan and made him try a little of his own medicine: he reminded him his personal failures, the true magnitude of his professional successes (much less spectacular than one would think, taking into account his explanations), his cultural deficiencies and his absolute lack of education. A whole bathroom of reality.

It was like seeing a boxer knocked out, with wide eyes that did not quite understand what was happening … It gave me deep sorrow, along with a sense of contempt. It’s hard to be sympathetic when you don’t say anything nice or nice to those around you. Is it the price of sincerity? No, it is the price of arrogance, lack of empathy and the absolute lack of education.

We are social beings, let’s not turn our environment into a jungle. Let’s measure the words, let’s show our greatness.